Having owned a dog, and knowing many other dog owners, I've heard the same questions posed over and over to our canine friends, but never once have I actually heard them answer. Stubborn fucks. So, I decided to try to get to the bottom of the mystery with Harold.
Here's the TOP FIVE QUESTIONS HUMANS ASK DOGS THAT HAVE YET TO BE ANSWERED.
5) Are you a sleepy puppy? (or, in some cultures, phrased as "Who's a sleepy puppy?") You look like a sleepy puppy. Are you a sleepy puppy?
4) Would you like a tummy rub? Would you? Would you?
3) Would you like a treat?
2) Why are you barking? What's going on? What are you barking at? Why are you barking?
1) Who's a good boy?
Thrity seconds of your life you'll never get back.
Have a good weekend.